I booked the trip to see Deborah in concert
We met through my podcast
I interviewed her about The Golden Cage
A beautiful two-hander musical
About freedom, restriction, and art
We started chatting every other week and
Became friends
Sharing stories and hope and inspiration to
Do the thing(s)

I decided to travel light
Just a backpack on
The Amtrak up north
Zipping through freezing cold air
Past fields covered in snow and
Frozen rivers and lakes and waterways
The bliss of the quiet car
And a seat to myself

A chance to see my life-twin
My prima guapa Rachel
And Christopher and Paul
And fur-nephew Jake
The joy of being snuggled up with a fur baby
A canine-shaped weighted water bottle 

Four hour lunch at the sushi train
With Rachel and Nina and Susannah
Laughing and dishing tea
Devouring salmon and rice and beef and
Mochi sprinkled with sesame

The loveliness of cooking a meal at home
Peeling and chopping apples
Stirring sauces
Sitting together

The delight of seeing DHC in concert
Her extraordinary musicianship
“We’re all a little out of tune. That’s how you know it’s real.”
The concept of "eclosion"
The process of becoming, of expanding latent wings
Deborah’s deft use of the loop pedal
The way her harp can play classical and jazz and blues and folk and original compositions
A piece of paper woven through the strings turns it into a percussion instrument
Watching Deborah sing and play
Her joy and skill and dexterity
I want to do that
What if Eurydice could have played the lyre?

Heading to a cheese and wine party
To celebrate a birthday
Meeting lovely new folks
Who chat passionately about film and tv and
Are excited for the Oscars
Laugh over film hot takes
How very dare you not like The Lord of the Rings

The next morning
A delightful brunch
(Preceded by a Lyft driver who picked up alto sax as a grown up, once made art in New York, and now works in biotech to try and cure endometriosis)
Finally meeting DHC in person and her lovely friend Erica
A real life fairy harpist
Talking about the world and music and fairies and heartbreak
The thrill of being loaned a lap harp
(And being glad I packed light!)

Arriving in Salem
Hanging out with the Rabinowii
My chosen family
Paul and Naomi, and Fred, and Emy and Nick, Louisa, and Charlotte
Sharing a truly delicious meal
Catching up and trading stories
And marveling at the pace at which children grow

Monday morning comes too quickly
As she always does
The thrill of being able to navigate transit in a city not my own
Figuring out a different system
Aah, this is how they do things here
The modern miracle of tap and pay
Of apps where you can pre-purchase your ticket
Taking the Amtrak back south
Past snow covered fields and
Frozen rivers and lakes and waterways

Thankful, thankful for the ease of the trip
For my community of lovely humans
For unexpected surprises
For time to read
And time to write
For the change of scenery and
A break in routine
For time away
That feels
Like a return to self.

​Walking to Hudson Yards
On a chilly New York evening 
Turning the corner
And being surprised 
By a festival of fairy lights
The trees all decked out with miniature bulbs 
The walls of the mall glittering golden light and 
Miniature hot air balloons rising out of the concourse
And around the corner
An installation of light bulbs and wood
Fashioned to look like a bonfire 
The delight of places for people to sit
And eat
And watch

There’s a tree outside my bunk
That emits small white puffs
That dance and twirl in the air
Making the world
Seem magic

To walk through the park
And come across
A magical being
Sparkling silver in the sunlight
With greenery growing from his gigantic antlers
And colorful butterflies sitting aloft

When it's suddenly 85F/29C
After weeks of cooler temps 
And you take walk through the North Woods of 
Central Park 
Following the lake and the little river 
Spotting waterfalls
And fairy dens 
People out bird watching 
Picnicking and sun bathing 
Running and walking 
Strolling and sauntering 
Lounging and eating 
​It's extraordinary to think
It was all made by human hands. 

I love the joy
That having sparkly hair
Evokes in others 
​It feels like I really am
A magical fairy

I got my hair did
Outfitted with strands of purple, black, and blue tinsel
That glitters in the light
I feel like a true fairy

Opening presents together
The warmth from sharing heart-made gifts
A fairy-filled wander, discovering
Velvet green moss and bright red berries and wood-textured mushrooms
Making Abuela’s flan in a heart shaped tin
The alchemy of sugar into caramel
Following Abuela’s recipe to the letter and hoping she’s watching over me so it turns out right
(Don’t over-stir the eggs, you don’t want them scrambled)
The feeling when you turn the flan out of the tin and it’s perfection
And memories of over two decades of Christmases
And Sunday lunches
And her smell
Come flooding back
The joy of sharing the taste of home
Teaching Vi how to make fairy bread
And then indulging in my favoite tradition
Chinese take out for dinner
The hand-written sign on the door
Christmas is open!!! Monday is open!!!
The restaurant where we picked up the food filled with white-haired Jews
Who also, in a way, feel like family
I miss the Rabinowii
Watching two movie musicals in one day!
(Spirited and Across the Universe)
And even though everything is different this year
Feeling embraced
Feeling warm
Feeling at home with another chosen family

A walk through downtown Manhattan with Al
And a chocolate orange will cure what ails you
As will Chinese food
And watching Hook for the first time in years