I love that my research
Introduces me to musicals
From around the world

​When I think sheet music
I think black and white
And carefully laid out
Lines and dots
The joy of discovering
A piece of art
About a piece of art

What was my favorite part of today?
Sitting in Central Park with a friend
Talking about boys and theatre and running
Or sharing a meal with a dear friend
And finally being able to eat a whole meal?!
Eating ice cream in Central Park
Watching the tail end of a game of baseball
Under a bright blue sky
Or staying up late writing music
Figuring out beats and rhythms and
EmPHAses
Or having the feeling that it is ok to feel well
To feel good
Or the feeling good
Feeling like I’m where I’m need to be
Even when it is overwhelming and scary and exciting and good

The synchronicity
Of watching a musical 
About making music in NYC
Where the love interest 
Was a street drummer 
Who played the plastic bucket
And schlepped paint drums downtown 
Then coming home 
And seeing a work train
Full of buckets 
​The music is everywhere. 

The joy of being able to watch
A musical filmed live in Seoul, Korea
The beautiful ballet 
The gorgeous costumes and
Stunning orchestrations. 
The magic of theatre 
​Across time and space. 

The joy of a little trip
To see a new musical 
Traipsing out to New Jersey and 
Being blown away by truly phenomenal singing 
Drinking hot chocolate from the bakery 
After the weather has unexpectedly turned 

An evening with dear friends 
The gut-punching realization that your young friend
Who you've known since she was 12
Is now the age you were 
When you first came here
And now she's old enough to have a local bar
And favorite beverages at said bar 
The joy of a piña colada and   
Cocktails with pop rocks 
Talking theatre until the bar empties out
​Walking giddily through Harlem

The seasonal pictures on the screensaver
Today blue lupines and orange red tulips
A pink orchid that reminds me of abuela
She had beautiful orchids
I wish she had shared her knowledge of how to tend to them
I wish I had asked
The nurse wipes down my arm with an alcohol wipe
Puts the cannula in
Flushes the line with saline
I can taste it
It’s comforting and
Bizarre that I can taste something in my vein
At my request, the techs play show tunes
The machine pings and clangs and whirs around me
Taking pictures of my insides
Michael Crawford and Colm Wilkinson and Idina Menzel sing in my ears
I am thankful for modern medicine and
Thankful I have access to it

The wonder of Shaina Taub
Writing and composing and starring in her own show
The contents of which are
Empowering and moving and uplifting and infuriating
The weaving of stories of so many women
Daring to tackle intersectionality
Daring women to take up space
Daring women to swear
You don’t want it to end
You want the storytelling to keep going
Show us where we are today
We’re still fighting
For autonomy over our bodies
Our paychecks
Our very existence
Produced by Hilary Clinton and Malala Yousafzai
Remember meeting Malala in London
What a life she has led
Could she ever have imagined she would produce a musical about women’s suffrage?!
Musical theatre royalty on the stage
Being awed and humbled and inspired by it all

Returning to the Kit Kat Club
This time in New York
This time as an usher
The adrenalin of working a show you've never worked before
In a brand new space 
With all new logistics
How gorgeous it looks
The thrill of it 
The theatricality of it
Getting to feel a part of it 
Even though you long to be on stage
And to paint your face
And wear fabulous costumes 
And to dance to that glorious music 
But for now you're in the room...
And how joyous it is