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I had two weeks of bliss
Commencing around New Year’s Day 
Where I had no symptoms
The nausea was gone
The fatigue was gone 
I had energy back
And I was starting to feel more like myself 

I was writing every day
Practising yoga
Meditating 
Cooking
Reading 
Enjoying my imposed convalescence 

Then I started a new chemo drug 
It targets the chromosomal mutation
Which makes a relapse more likely 
It also makes me 
Nauseous 
Curled-up-fetal-drained-of-all-energy-nauseous 
Even-the-thought-of-food-makes-me-feel-awful-nauseous 
And fatigued 

And now my nails are falling off. 
It started with a hairline crack in each thumbnail
Which became a second layer of nail
Starting half-way down and extending down to the nail edge
One by one, each finger developed double nail layers 
Then the second layer started lifting.

On Thursday, the second nail on my right middle finger
Came right off
Exposing the skin
And hurting like hell
Band-aids are a marvelous modern
Convenient invention 

I’m off the chemo drug again
Now I have to wait and see
If the nausea and fatigue go away. 

In the meantime,
Keep meditating
Keep writing
Lay low
Be still
And breathe 

This too shall pass. 

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