Today
In my acting job
Where I play a fake patient
To help train student doctors
I was diagnosed with cancer four times
By students learning 
How to deliver bad news
For the first time
It was exhausting
And emotional
And strangely cathartic

Being here now
Giving real life feedback
This is what it's like when you first hear the word cancer
This is what it's like to hear lots of medical jargon
This is how much it means when the person delivering the worst news
Connects with you as a human being

The emergency room doctor 
In New Milford Hospital who said to me 
After the first round of what would be
Endless blood work 
You're going to start to hear the word "cancer" 
He was direct
But he was kind

I think of the family and friends 
I've lost to stupid fucking cancer 
Four in the past year alone
Ruth, Erin, Miren, Miguel

It's a club we never wanted to be part of 
But once you're in 
You're in 
Life becomes B.C. and A.C.
Before Cancer 
After Cancer

And today
I can feel thankful
That I survived 
And even though I won't become a nurse
Or a doctor 
I can give something back 
So that the next person
Who has to be told 
You're going to start to hear the word cancer
Will be met with humanity.