Today I am 39½-years-old 
Some of my cohort are anxious about 
The Big Four-Oh 
But I almost didn't see 30 
Every year post-cancer
Is a victory lap 
And today I ran 5km 
And got a couple of vaccine boosters
And went to work 
Hung out with some friends and
Came home and made pizza 

I'm not exactly where I hoped I'd be 
At this point 
On the Path of Life 
There is a lot of pain
In my heart
(and right now in my body, courtesy of the aforementioned vaccines) 
I didn't expect or want to be divorced 
My sweet puppy lives on the other side of the country 
My career is... frustrating 
I haven't slept properly in 2 months because of the goddamn pipes 
There are many complicated factors that are 
Making Things Hard 

But I'm thankful I get to be here at all 
When it's really hard 
And I'm crying from the hurt 
I try to return to the breathing 
The in, the pause, the out, the pause 
Repeat, repeat, repeat until... 
The absolute privilege of 
Being Here.