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A friend recently visited form the land of Oz
“Why do you want to live here?!” he asked.
On paper, it is rather hard to comprehend.
The lack of affordable healthcare
The proliferation of guns
The insane inane infuriating never-ending red tape of bureaucracy to achieve the simplest tasks
A government that seems hell bent on destroying its own people
It is an empire in decline
And that’s all before we throw in the notion of Becoming a Professional Actor in New York City When You Are Not Wealthy and Moved Here From a Whole Other Country and Did I Mention You Had Cancer and Dealing with The Starting All Over Again at 33 Despite The Fact You Have a Masters in Theatre My God This Is Hard
And yet, and yet…
How I love to be in the greatest city in the world
In class, a casting director said her job is
“The highest of highs
The lowest of lows”
Until it is my job to be in a Broadway show
It is my job to watch Broadway shows
(Technically it is my job to watch audiences watching Broadway shows
But I’ve gotten rather good at having my eyes in two places at once
Yes we can see your goddamn cellphone
Turn. It. Off.)
Sondheim was in the other day
The actual living breathing legendary genius was sitting on the other side of the room
I scanned the ticket of one of my musical idols
The people who created the music of my childhood walk the streets I walk
Those departed once worked in the theatres I work in
The other day I was in the orchestra of the St James and I thought
Rodgers and Hammerstein stood here and watched their music and lyrics come to life
Making peace with the fact that the shows I’m working for a raking in millions
While the staff have to work two jobs to pay their rent.
I am auditioning on a weekly basis
I got a callback for a Shakespeare
They said it would be movement based and, inspired by Meryl Tankard, it would be gestural and based in the everyday
Perfect
I got to the audition and was
Surrounded
By lithe, beautiful people.
One particularly tall and stunning human
Did full-out splits in heels as part of his warm-up
(It turned out he works professionally as a drag queen)
The first part of the audition was fun
The strange delight of walking around a room “in neutral”
Drama school exercise at its finest
The Art of Act-ing.
Then we had to learn a hiphop routine
Little Ms Whitey McWhite White with precisely minus zero seconds of hiphop training
Floundered but tried her best
When it’s good - shows! auditions! doing the thing! - it’s magical and shiny and glorious
When it’s hard - no shows! no auditions! you cannot do the thing - you wonder why anyone would want to live any where near this grimy, over-populated, subways disintegrating at the seams, rat infested, island
At night, the Empire State Building glitters and twinkles
In the streets below, the homeless make their beds on discarded boxes that once held designer handbags.
“Why do you want to live here?!” he asked.
On paper, it is rather hard to comprehend.
The lack of affordable healthcare
The proliferation of guns
The insane inane infuriating never-ending red tape of bureaucracy to achieve the simplest tasks
A government that seems hell bent on destroying its own people
It is an empire in decline
And that’s all before we throw in the notion of Becoming a Professional Actor in New York City When You Are Not Wealthy and Moved Here From a Whole Other Country and Did I Mention You Had Cancer and Dealing with The Starting All Over Again at 33 Despite The Fact You Have a Masters in Theatre My God This Is Hard
And yet, and yet…
How I love to be in the greatest city in the world
In class, a casting director said her job is
“The highest of highs
The lowest of lows”
Until it is my job to be in a Broadway show
It is my job to watch Broadway shows
(Technically it is my job to watch audiences watching Broadway shows
But I’ve gotten rather good at having my eyes in two places at once
Yes we can see your goddamn cellphone
Turn. It. Off.)
Sondheim was in the other day
The actual living breathing legendary genius was sitting on the other side of the room
I scanned the ticket of one of my musical idols
The people who created the music of my childhood walk the streets I walk
Those departed once worked in the theatres I work in
The other day I was in the orchestra of the St James and I thought
Rodgers and Hammerstein stood here and watched their music and lyrics come to life
Making peace with the fact that the shows I’m working for a raking in millions
While the staff have to work two jobs to pay their rent.
I am auditioning on a weekly basis
I got a callback for a Shakespeare
They said it would be movement based and, inspired by Meryl Tankard, it would be gestural and based in the everyday
Perfect
I got to the audition and was
Surrounded
By lithe, beautiful people.
One particularly tall and stunning human
Did full-out splits in heels as part of his warm-up
(It turned out he works professionally as a drag queen)
The first part of the audition was fun
The strange delight of walking around a room “in neutral”
Drama school exercise at its finest
The Art of Act-ing.
Then we had to learn a hiphop routine
Little Ms Whitey McWhite White with precisely minus zero seconds of hiphop training
Floundered but tried her best
When it’s good - shows! auditions! doing the thing! - it’s magical and shiny and glorious
When it’s hard - no shows! no auditions! you cannot do the thing - you wonder why anyone would want to live any where near this grimy, over-populated, subways disintegrating at the seams, rat infested, island
At night, the Empire State Building glitters and twinkles
In the streets below, the homeless make their beds on discarded boxes that once held designer handbags.
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